The SciFi channel has announced that mentalist Derren Brown’s show “Mind Control” will return for a second season, and that the first episode will feature, “an event so amazing it will make you amazingly amazed.”

I’ve spoken to a number of insiders, and apparently the reason that they are not being more forthcoming about the exact nature of the performance is that they are still in the process of deciding what it will be. Current top contenders are:

  • Guess how much money is in the pocket of someone standing on the other side of the Great Wall of China.
  • Make hundreds of WalMart customers simultaneously believe that beer has been made illegal — without causing a riot.
  • Win 1,000 consecutive games of Rock, Paper, Scissors while sealed in a block of ice.
  • Hypnotize American Democrats so that they forget to count votes from Florida and Michigan primaries.
  • Convince the light atop the Luxor hotel that it’s the light atop the Stratosphere hotel.
  • Use subconscious hints and clues to get Osama bin Laden to deliver a pizza to the Pentagon.
  • Get SciFi channel producers to sign up for Mind Control season three.